This October is heaven for workers and hell for employers. Three major holidays fall into this month, and none of them is on a weekend. The New Year (Rosh Ha'Shana), Atonement Day (Yom Kippur) and Thanks Giving (well, kind of, anyway, Succot) cocktail will create havoc in the economy and on the roads.
It starts with the traffic jams. All highways, especially those leading from the center towards the Galilee, are totally blocked from the second the kids get to leave school until 4 AM next morning. I will never understand why everybody has to spend the holidays up north. Somebody's relatives have to live in the south!
Then comes the festive dinner. A living room packed with people beyond the structural limit of the floor, an endless flow of dishes from the kitchen onto the plates, kids shouting, dogs barking, parents trying to outscream the kids. Occasionally a short moment of civilized silence, and then the battle noise starts again. At some point things slow down a little, the guests are just too stuffed to show normal vital signs. Then the crucial decision: Skip desert, run to the car and maybe make it back home before the traffic jams start again, or hold out until 4 AM and return after the jams. In other words, can you keep eating until dawn?
Then comes the bad conscience. Again we eat much too much. Why can we not skip first dish, soup, bread, salad and whatever else comes before the main course? How long will we fight to loose that needlessly acquired ballast? Thank God for Yom Kippur - this year we will actually want to fast! How would we otherwise be back in shape for Succot? Gosh, just think of all that food...
And finally, the New Year's resolution: Next Year we'll behave like responsible adults and say no to the Gefillte Fish!.
Yeah, sure. Happy New Year!